Thoughts on solos and small ensembles

Yesterday, I took 13 students to district solo and small ensemble festival.  We had learning experiences of all kinds occur.  A freshman has the opportunity to go to state, a junior and two seniors gave their best and were happy that they went and proud of themselves for taking on the challenge. Some seniors realized that they did not prepare as much as they could have.  Other younger members realized that there is a little more to it and now have plans to do better next time.  So, I sat here trying to think of what kind of advice I could give these kids so that they can get the most out of this experience.  I started typing and by the time I was finished, I had another blog post that I wanted to share.  I plan on sharing this with my kids this year, and then using it next year as we begin the sign-up process for solos and small ensembles.

Thoughts on solo and small ensembles that can really apply to anything that you want to be successful at...

1.  It is not easy!

It is not easy to get up in front of the judge and perform, it is not easy to woodshed and practice difficult music, and it is not easy to make the commitment and sacrifice the amount of time it takes to prepare for such an event. It is not easy!

2.  It is worth it!

If you truly want to become a better musician, are interested in majoring in music, want to really challenge yourself/put yourself out there, get over performance nerves, and help build self-confidence, then do this. It is worth it!

3.  You must dedicate time to this.

You cannot be successful at this if you don't set time aside. You must plan to practice and plan rehearsals (they are two different things).

4.  Mrs. Boyd is here to help you, but she will not chase you down the hallway and ask you to practice and if you are going to come in for a lesson/rehearsal.

She will stay after school and come in early whenever possible, but you must do one thing...ASK HER! Again, she will do whatever she can to help you as long as you are willing to help yourself!!!

5.  Procrastination leads to disappointment

Waiting until the last minute to "cram" will result in a disappointing experience for you, no matter what rating you receive.

6.  The saying "It's not about the number," goes both ways.

Some people will work really hard, give it their all, and still get a 2, or maybe a 3, but that's okay! Again, it's all about improving, not proving. Some people won't have to work very hard, do just above the bare minimum, and still get a 2, and in rare cases, maybe even a 1, but they will still know they could have done better. This is why it is not about the number, it's about you and becoming a better musician through the process, and ultimately, it's about becoming a better person overall.

7.  You cannot compare yourself to others.

You can only compare yourself to the person/musician you were yesterday. If you constantly look at others and feel bad because you didn't achieve what they did, you will never be satisfied. This also applies to the fact that if you always compare yourself to those who achieve less than you, then you will have a false sense of accomplishment. It is not bad to seek out others for inspiration, but you must always remember that you are you, you cannot be anyone else.

8.  Be honest!

With yourself and with others. Do not tell people about how you have been too busy to practice, do not tell yourself that you just "can't do this..." Like number 1 says, "It's not easy." Be honest about it, if you have a hard time with something, ask for help. If you did not prepare properly for your lesson, own up to it and don't waste other peoples' time. Get back to work and try again. Placing blame where responsibility should be only creates a negative world. It's simply mind pollution.

9.  No matter what the outcome, it is not the end of the road.

If you are a senior and you think, "This is my last chance at district festival and if I don't get a 1, I will never get to go to state," then you have not read and/or you really do not understand what all of the previous points are about. This experience is not about who can get to state, it's about becoming a better musician and ultimately, a better person. That cannot be said enough. 

10.  All of this means nothing if you do not learn anything from it. 

It's what you choose to do with it, and really there are only two choices. 

Choice A is to get better, keep moving forward, and always strive to be the best you can possibly be. 

Choice B...give up.

Things I learned during 2013

Relax and trust your own judgement more.  Say this to yourself, "I do know what I am doing (most of the time)."

"I don't have time..." is not an acceptable excuse from your students, so stop using it yourself!

Let people help you!

When you have a hard time communicating what you want to say or what you need done, write it down!

Small ensembles are good for the large ensemble!

No one wants to hear you talk nonstop.  Please...stop...talking.  Try listening a little more.

Stop worrying about who is quitting next year and focus on making a music program that all students want to join!

Work a little smarter at work, then leave work at work.  It won't happen magically, you must make it happen.

Balance is a must.  The happy medium may not ever be found, but always work to get closer to it.

Administrators have a lot on their plate, be thankful when they are able to help you.  When you need their help, be simple and straight-forward.

Pick music that fits your group(s).  You cannot teach them the higher levels of musicianship if you are constantly giving them things that they are not ready for technically.

I enjoy teaching choir!  A lot!

A grouchy teacher doesn't usually motivate and inspire many students.

Tell them you care, and why you care.  Also, let them know you believe in them.  They, just...like...you...cannot read minds (yeah, another dose of your own medicine).

When a student comes into your office and says they want to talk to you, stop doing whatever it is that you are doing, face them, listen attentively, and be ready for anything!

Give yourself time to put things away correctly.

Help your student leadership become better leaders!

Do not go to any events to prove anything, only go to improve.

Compromising is a two-way street.

Recruit for choir if you want more students in choir.  (Seriously, this hit me at the end of last school year.)

Give them a reason to stay in during middle school that doesn't have anything to do with, "When you get to high school..."

Remember, you didn't join beginning band either.  Not many students will be able to come in and get caught up, but if they ask, at least give them a chance.

If you aren't enjoying it, then your students probably aren't either.

Sometimes, the quiet ones are listening to you much more than you think.  If you are lucky, you will have a co-worker that will bring you a copy of an essay that a quiet student wrote about you and being in band.  If this happens, you might need a tissue.

If you want your band/choir to be the best they can possibly be, you must become the best director you can possibly be!

I absolutely love my job and I will share it with the entire world!

Performance anxiety helps me teach, and vice versa

I used to be very jealous of the performers that could go out on stage and play with little nerve issues.  People that might get a little nervous, but were able to keep calm and in control...I didn't think it was fair.  Now, I will admit that some of my performance anxiety when I was in college was from bad attitude and poor preparation, but even after I got over myself and grew up, I still suffered from this awful anxiety.  I deal with it even now.  It's not as bad, and I know how to manage it a little better, but it is always there.

After dealing with this anxiety, I have realized that it has made some of my accomplishments all the more meaningful for me.  I have learned to believe in myself and really push myself when times get tough.  The one thing that I did not expect, however, is how helpful it would be when it came to teaching adolescent musicians.  I don't coddle, I don't make excuses for them, and I don't let them back out.  I push them and I want to see them do more...and when they get nervous, I explain to them how to get through it.  I share my stories and my insight from first-hand experience.  I let them know that they can be scared, nervous, shy, and everything else in between, and still work through it and enjoy it.  I let them know that it's worth it, too.  I tell them how I black out sometimes when I have to play, I tell them of times where I've played anything but the right notes...and then I smile at them and say, "And look, I am still here."  I walk them through, step by step of what an audition or solo will be like, what the room will be like, what the judge(s) will do.  I explain to them how to recover from mistakes, how to take a compliment, even when it's the last thing they want to hear because they know they messed up horrifically.  I know it's nothing we really want to happen, but after being through it, and being able to explain what happens...they are a little less scared.  And when they understand that it's NATURAL to be nervous and that it is WORTH IT to keep going, they start to refocus on the real reason why they chose to play music it in the first place.  I never thought I would be glad that I got so nervous when I performed.  I never thought that the insane amount of self-doubt I put myself through would pay off in such a way.  Speaking of self doubt...

So, I still struggle with doubting myself.  It's nothing near what I dealt with as a teenager or early 20s, but it is always there...lingering and just waiting for a moment of weakness.  When I became a teacher, I was scared and excited.  That chance I always wanted, the chance to make a difference, had finally arrived.  Along with it came fear.  Fear of failure.  Fear of not knowing the right answers.  Thankfully, through music I had gained just enough self-confidence to push through it.  When I stand in front of those young minds, those many young minds that depend on me to provide them with a music education.  Those young minds that need to know they are very important and capable of great things, I couldn't imagine being scared for a minute.  Knowing that they depend on me for opportunities that no one else in that school will be able to provide them with gives me so much strength and confidence that I sometimes feel invincible.  One by one, they forever change my life, not just professionally, but personally.  They believe in me and put their trust in me which forces me to believe in myself and take chances on my own ideas!  I tell them that I had no idea the amount of inspiration and motivation I was going to stand in front of everyday.  I get up every morning wanting to do better, learn more, work harder, and be happier.  I know that would not have happened if I would have accepted defeat and not gone back to school to become a music educator.

I often joke about how I always find the most difficult way of doing something.  If there is a road that is 3 times as long than the main road, I end up taking it.  I beat myself up that I lost out on opportunities I will never get back, that I should have spoken up for myself when I was in a situation, and that I could have been better.  Then, the bell rings and none of that matters anymore because I have young minds that are looking at me waiting for me to show them that they are awesome and that I believe in them.  It makes all the other little worries go away and makes my heart smile.

Feedback On Good Feedback

Today I received some feedback on how important it is for me to give good feedback.

I have a hard time doing in-depth playing assessments sometimes.  I get wrapped up in rehearsal mode and there is no easy way to assess individually in a timely manner.  Since I am the only person, and I don't want to sit and make the kids go down the line and play once a week and waste a lot of rehearsal time, I decided last year that I would set up my laptop and let the students record their playing tests on my camera.  It's not my favorite way of testing, but it definitely allows me to take my time in grading, go back and check things again, and most importantly, give thorough feedback.

I have a young trumpet player who doesn't always have the confidence in herself like she should.  She is GOOD!  Great kid, practices her butt off, and really knows her stuff, but is always a bit timid.  Yes, she reminds me of myself, only she is much better than I was.  She is also the only trumpet player left from my very first group of beginners.  I spend a lot of time trying to convince this girl that she is a great musician and she needs to play out more.

Anyway, I was doing binder checks today.  This is where the kids have to come up and show me their band binders and flip through the sections they are supposed to have.  She came up and as I was having her show me that she has all of her stuff, she decided to show me one of her folders that she had in there.  There was a piece of paper taped to the front of this folder with some writing on it.  As I looked closer, it was the comment section from one of her playing tests last year.  I wrote that she was a great trumpet player and that she needed to believe in herself more.  I said that if she did, she would go very far.  At the bottom I wrote in all capital letters, really big "I BELIEVE IN YOU, __________!"  I was speechless.  And kicking myself for not doing more assessments where I can give kids in-depth feedback.  This student appreciated hearing words of encouragement from me so much that she kept them and taped them into her band binder where she could read them all of the time.

So, I learned my lesson today.  Those long evenings where I thought I was wasting my time writing out all those comments about an exercise out of a method book were not wasted at all.  I must make more opportunities to give kids individual feedback.  They know that I care about the band and how well we perform and our work ethic and attitudes, but I need to make sure that they know I am there to help them and that I believe in them.  Yes, they are one band working together, but they are my students and it is my responsibility to make sure I help them grow individually as much as I can.  More importantly, they need to know that I care.

Why this blog?

I love music and teaching music.  I enjoy sharing ideas and learning from my experiences.  I want to put everything in writing so I can look back and remind myself of my journey.  I also want to share with the rest of the world what I find inspiring.  We only learn if we put ourselves out there and that is what I am doing.  The better I become, the more I can help others, and that is the ultimate goal.  I want to help people. I want to make and impact on the world.

I have worried about sharing too much in fear that I would be looked at like a young teacher that still has much to learn, but thinks she's got it all figured out.  But thanks to many of my friends on Facebook responding to my posts about teaching, I realized that some people enjoy reading about what I do and my passion for it.  If people enjoy it, then I feel it's helping somehow.  I don't want to wait until I retire to share ideas that help me, I want to share them now.  If I wait, I might not remember the small details that make up each year that mean so very much to me.  I don't want to lose those precious memories or feelings, I want to capture them in writing and remember them forever.  We, band and choir directors, have our students do concert reflections for a reason--so they can learn from their experiences.  This blog is my teaching reflection.


Breaking out of my shell has been a 28-year process, and I am still working on it, trying to fight the habit of hesitation that is much more faint, but still there.  Music gave me a glimmer of confidence when I was young.  Band showed me that I could do whatever I set my mind to, even when other people doubted me.  College taught me that I am responsible for my own future and to strive to overcome my insecurities.  Teaching reminds me every day that I don't have time to be shy or scared.  My students need someone to show them how to believe in themselves and how to be a good person.  I don't have time to beat myself and call myself a failure, they will see that and do the same.  I am required to believe in myself and do the right thing, and you can't fake it.  You either do or you don't.  If you try to fake it, they will see it and they won't trust you.  You have to be real and you have to be honest.  Teaching has pushed me to believe in myself, be real, and be honest.  Coincidentally, I found out that it's not just good for my students, but it's good for me, personally.  Life is much more enjoyable when I strive to do better!

Getting back to the main point of this post, I decided to start sharing and open up more.  Summer break is a time to reflect, develop, and prepare for the next year.  I told myself to quit being such a wimp and put my ideas out there.  What's the worst that will happen, someone won't read this?

By the way, thanks for reading.

10 Very Important Things I Want My Students to Know

If you know me, you know that I enjoy being a teacher and feel it is my true calling.  I cannot simply put my passion for teaching into words, but here are a few things that I believe might show why I try to do my very best everyday.  I don't always succeed.  I have bad days, but I try to learn from them and move on to try for another good day.  My inspiration for teaching comes from lessons that I had to learn the hard way combined with my eternal love for music.  Music, ultimately, in ways I cannot explain in a blog post, but maybe a book, brought me to each of the lessons listed below.


10 Things I Want My Students to Know

1.  You are never really alone.  Many will say you have to think for yourself and make these important decisions because no one else can make them for you, which is true, but that doesn't mean you are alone. There are many people that care about you and are willing to help you weigh options and think through these decisions, and I am one of them.

2.  Ask questions.  I used to be too scared to ask questions for fear that I would look stupid for not knowing.  I could have, and should have, taken the chance to "look stupid" for a few minutes because I would have felt much better later because I wouldn't have "felt stupid" after I had the answer.  I would have learned something new, and in 99% of the cases, for FREE!

3.  Vent when you are frustrated.  If you are fed up with things and need to vent to someone, do it!  Just make sure it's a friend and they know you are venting.  DO NOT vent on Facebook or any other public forum.  You may think it's a safe place, but it's not.   You may hate your college professor or new boss, but no good can come from them finding this out via word of mouth or Facebook.  Please, just trust me on this.

4.  Don't be afraid to change your mind.  Ever.

5.  There are at least two sides to every situation.  You must be able to work with people you don't like to get things done.  Chances are, if you are really mad or frustrated with a situation, then it is that much more important that you try your hardest to see the other point of view.  Also, make sure you are always respectful while you are trying to do this.  You can be a jerk if you like, but so can they.

6.  When things are becoming difficult, you are about to learn something important.  You will learn from the "right" decision, and you will learn from the "wrong" decision.  You will not learn much, though, by avoiding the decision.

7.  Do not point fingers.  You are responsible for your own actions, your own choices, your own education, and your impact on this world.  Whether you have amazing teachers/mentors/bosses or not, you are the one in charge of you.  You can blame other people all you like, but it will not help you get anywhere.  I tried...it was far from rewarding.  Getting off my butt and doing something proved to be much more beneficial.

8.  Not motivated or inspired?  You are in charge of finding means of motivation and inspiration, too.  Sometimes you have to seek it out, sometimes it will be presented to you.  Ultimately, internal motivation must be present, but external inspiration will be necessary when it runs low.

9.  Find a mentor(s) and be a mentor. Even though you are still learning, there are young minds that need you.  Are you setting the example?  If a younger person were to model your behavior, would you be proud?  You might feel that it is not your job to help those young people, but it is.  Whether you choose to take that job seriously or not, they will still watch you.

10.  I believe in you.  It does not matter what you choose to do with your life, whether you graduate and want to be an auto mechanic, a music education major, an engineer, a nurse, a rock star, whatever... I believe in YOU.  You have the ability to be the best person you can be.  I know it and I believe it, and I will continue to do so for ever and ever, no matter what.  No matter if you talk to me every day after high school or never again, always remember, "No matter where you go, or whatever you do, your band/choir director believes in you."


I am a music teacher, and yes, I want to help my students develop a love for music and being a musician, but there is more to it.  I think teenagers are amazing.  They really are wonderful young people.  I think that when we complain and make negative comments about them, we are setting the wrong example.  They need help and guidance, just as we all do at times.  I know that I am a "geek" about teaching, and I wouldn't have it any other way, but I share these things because I think that if more people of all occupations, religions, political positions, media figures...if more think about things like this on a daily basis, young people might be more apt to make the right decisions.  People in general might look for more good and try to do more good.

Thanks for reading.

First year reflection: I have 9 kids in jazz band...what do I do with them?

I teach in an isolated, rural area.  Many of these students can probably talk hunting with anyone for at least a day or two.  I've often thought of taking up the sport just to better understand them.  Just kidding, I am not a hunter.  It's not going to happen.  Anyway, it is rather impressive to watch these country kids get into jazz.

My first year, I had nine kids.  One alto sax, two flutes, two trumpets, two trombones, a drummer and a clarinet player that wanted to play guitar.  Thankfully, she was a good sport and agreed to take up bass.  Also, thankfully, she was a really great musician that caught on quick and stayed with us for three years.  These kids were my portal to understanding the rest of the music program that I had just became the director of.  I was able to sit with them and ask about their past experiences, what they thought of the program, what they would like to see happen, and most importantly, I was able to see what level of musicianship they were at.  They were the ambassadors of the rest of the musicians.  Once I figured out what they knew, and more importantly what they didn't know, I understood so much more of what I needed to do with the rest of the groups.